It's a Queer Queer Queer (shudder) World

I'm downing this beer as fast as I can, having just come from an "interview" with one of the most stunningly inefficient people I've ever met. Having started ONE FULL HOUR after our scheduled meeting time, I was eager to get in there, talk myself up, get hired, and get out. Instead I got to wait. A lot. The first time my potential employer took a call from his lawyer regarding a health issue I took the opportunity to collect my thoughts, look around and see what needed to be done (by me, natch) to help get things organized, the second time I began to familiarize myself a little bit with the product. By the time he started actually placing calls to hammer out details regarding packaging I began to be somewhat peeved, and finally when he checked, then ANSWERED HIS CELL PHONE and sustained a lengthy conversation over whether or not he would skip out for the afternoon to, "knock off nine holes," I admit- I almost started to cry.

During the course of our meeting he was on the phone not less than six times, then wanted to make an appointment so I can come back and, presumably, wait around some more! Efficiency, I tell you! Adorably, he was also patriarchal and homophobic, and made great issue of my inclusion of the Queer Lounge on my resume, digging around to find out just how I feel about Those Kinds of People, and to make sure I haven't been recruited and am just not letting on about it. This fretting and probing went on at length, until he admitted experience with "an unfortunate intimacy on the subject," (like he's a big emmer-effing queer theorist or something) and I, flailing to steer the conversation off this course of doom, found myself explaining that, "it's not my pet cause," which is true, but still left me feeling sullied and traitorous.

The whole time I kept thinking this is a game, Em, treat it like a game, all you have to do is come here, and do your job, and PRETEND. You will be able to tell whether you're winning by how well you pretend, see? A game! And I know that I COULD play it, and it wouldn't be so bad. There are things I could do for the business and, having done them, I'd be liked, and in being liked I could influence the bigoted opinions of the boss I'd be interacting with every day. Maybe. On the plus side, the guy is anti-Bush Administration. Too bad he's also vociferously anti-immigrant- if you wouldn't mind not mentioning that to the Mexicans in the other room hard at work keeping his business running.

Anyway he's not all bad; in fact he's certainly charming in many ways. He has rather beautiful smooth skin for someone his age, for example. I could point out that his T's are beautifully articulated. And he's kind of sweetly lispy and precise, so that one can perceive the strong likelihood that he has endured a lifetime of being mistaken for a total queer gay fag cocksucker.

For example.

I don't mean to be so bitter, but part of the reason I came out to California was to get away from his Type, with their wide-eyed, patently offensive Good-Ol'-Boy "innocence." I thought I'd left that (and the lurking darnger of marrying into it) behind in Salt Lake City. Then I had to deal with this guy, and then there was this insane retarded angry homophobic letter to the editor in the local weekly (which is not online but I'll hunt it down and append to this post later), and it's all conspired to leave me feeling rather bruised and tender, to the point that I think I'd better leave it at this for the moment.

Comments

[Terri B]

ARRGGHHH!!!
This would be a subject that I too, would find myself in total defense and so I understand your anger.
I would've kneed him in the balls, Mle! Then told him he was a cocksucker and to go F*%# himself!
But, that's just me. I hate stupid male-ego-homophobes.

[Sare Bare]

Mle!

I remember way back when, when you told me to look at Lucy's Spleen, but I was just looking at the actual pictures of her spleen. I didn't put it together that it was a continuing blog. I found the link on Lolly's blog and some other surprises too! Glad to hear that you are loving Cali, but am not glad that you have to deal with f*ck-wits!

Luvs, luvs and more luvs..

S*

[GraceD]

yer mamma wrote "assbag of fuckedness"

IT IS TO SWOON!

[brook]

I changed the video to public viewing. I don't know how it became private in the first place.

[SpleenMa]

hunny,
the thang is, he is NOT your potential employer, he is an assbag of fuckedness, and you would only suffer in trying to please someone with such an incredible lack of A) respect for you, 2) social perspective, and IV) clues! clues!

meanwhile, someone on the pdx craigslist is advertising for a knitting barista, which is yet another reason that you should move here.
heart,
Mammy

[MonoCerdo]

Oh, Emma, I'm so sorry. This kind of thing leaves you feeling vulnerable and enranged simultaneously and I'm just glad you're coping the best way possible (beer!). I think arexa's right that his interviewing techniques are at the very least subliminaly illegal, and definitely offensive and wrong, and if you happen to say something to that effect in an articulate and pointed (and not queer or immigrated) letter, both to this man and to the editor, you might feel better. Or you could just have more beer. Which is probably what I would do.

xx,
Cerdo

[superdeens]

Don't give up on California!!! Yet!!

[kerri]

Yeah, this guy sounds like an ass. A very narrow-minded, silly sort of ass. I hope your next interview goes better. And that Cali soon redeems itself.

[arexa]

hey! emily! you could probably totally fucking sue this guy if you don't get the job!(not that you'd want it?)i just read all about this shit tonite and this smooth-skinned man clearly needs to "reconsider his interviewing techiniques" to stay out of hot, boiling investigative waters. anyways. i'm sorry the world sucks and that califonrnia ain't none better than utard. i think i'll go have a beer for you and then shoot the bottle with a gun. hugs!